What The Hell: An autobiography
by Pirate College Graduate
Summary: Alex Thompson, 21, has been asked to make a recording of the events of her life that transpired between May 2013 to September 2013. Topics will include reincarnation, Egypt, disgusting ass mummies (not literally), action, adventure, douchebag bad guys, and making a hell of a lot of new friends. Recording may or may not include a hell of a lot of profanity, and/or shenanigans. Enjoy
1. Chapter 1

AN: Okay, so I know I'm in the process of writing another vic, and I told myself I would do one fic at a time, but this fic just won't leave me alone, and so I decided after a spurt of energy that I should at least try and crack a chapter out if I could. ALSO, I tried so hard to name my new main character, Alex, something else. I did. I pictured so many other names to use, especially since Alexandria is the main character in my other fic. But alas, no other name would work. Alex is the absolute perfect name for this new character, whom I already love even though I haven't penned (typed them, rather) to paper yet. I also tried to be clever and name all the reincarnated characters names that the actors had actually used in other roles. It'll make sense later. ALSO be warned, LOTS of foul language will be used. Lots. This character is like the filthy sass queen You have been warned.

Anyway, enjoy! Any follows, reviews, or comments at ALL are appreciated and most welcome!

Also, I don't own anything you recognize, as sad as that sounds. But I would. I so would.

_The following is a voice recording from September 4, 2013._

Okay, I don't even know where to begin with this shit, honestly. I mean, so much shit has happened to me in the past few months that laying it all out for some dumbass stranger to listen to just seems really stupid and unnecessary, but Farik keeps telling me every chance he gets that "You must honor the wishes of the gods, Alex. If they desire it, so you should act on it." No, those are not my words and yes, that's his exact wording. When you hear it from the same guy like fifteen times every goddamn day it's sorta hard to ignore. It's like that episode of American Dad where Roger the Alien won't stop making that really annoying "MYEH" noise until Hailey and Jeff give him their $50,000.

What?

What was that?

Okay, okay, Farik, Jesus Christ, I'm going, I'm going. I don't even know why I feel like I HAVE to do what you-

What the fuck? He just slammed the door in my face! If I didn't already owe him my life and my firstborn like five thousand times over I would be at the mall getting Sbarro or hanging with Lily and Tom, who are so much fucking fun and are also expecting a baby. It's so fucking cute.

Farik, I swear to God, if you interrupt me one more time I'll throw this whole thing in the trash. What? Yes! Yes I will! I don't care how much you paid for it! Get outta here! Love you!

Okay, thanks to him, I lost track of…no wait, never mind, I'm back on track.

I guess I should start with when I was young. Okay, younger. 21 is still pretty damn young. I guess about….third grade or something. I was always the really weird little brown-skinned girl who sorta kept to herself, of her own free will at first but then not by choice after 2001 when suddenly everyone was scared of anyone who wasn't alabaster white. Anyway, I remember we were reading a book in Mrs. Simmons' class. Okay, she was reading to us, cause we barely knew how to read beyond Junie B. Jones at that point. Anyway, she decided she would read us the novelization of the Prince of Egypt. Damn good movie. It was sorta weird reading the book aloud, because you know, half of that movie is musical numbers.

But I just remembered that Mrs. Simmons reading that book aloud was my favorite part of the day. It was right after lunch, and her room always had that really awesome and delicious smell of microwaved food that you would think would be a shitty smell but never was. At least to me it never was. Anyway, that book was the first book that ever introduced me to Egypt. Weird, right? Like usually that's one of the first things that kids learn about when they pop out of the womb. But I never did. Dad was gone, either to Hell or Alabama, mom never said which, and mom didn't like church cause she hated all the phonies in there (her words, not mine). I mean sure, we attended Christmas mass, but I was either too busy wondering where Santa was, or playing with new toys he'd given me. Plus the Christmas stuff usually just takes place in Bethlehem and all that.

Okay, whoops. I have this bad habit of getting off track. Whoever finds this and decides to listen to it, I totally apologize in advance.

But yeah, Egypt. Even just the word on my tongue at such a young age felt right somehow. Like the first time she said it I couldn't stop saying it. I said it over and over, at lunch, where I would just sit there and draw stuff, and on the bus, where I would just sit and stare out the window.

Not only was the story fascinating, but the description of the setting was fascinating as well. It was like a sandy magical land filled with beauty and drama and death and revenge. Sometimes, when teacher wasn't around I would take the book off her desk and smell it and look at the pictures in the middle. You know what I'm talking about. The really cool novelizations of children's movies with the glossy color pictures in the middle that had stills from the film. I would look at those and study them until I memorized them. I would go home and draw them. And I didn't focus on Moses and the bush or any of that. I focused on the Egyptian stuff. Ramses. Moses pre-Godspell. All the hieroglyphics (I called them pretty pictures when I was younger) and the eyeliner and the temples and sand. All that sand.

It just felt…._right._ Like I belonged there. Or had belonged there. Which didn't make sense to me. Like I don't know, like I said I wasn't religious, but I remembered all those nice posters that teachers had on the walls that basically proclaimed YOLO (You Only Live Once, in case anyone listening to this has lived under a fucking rock for the past few years) and religious kids in school always said stuff like that too. I didn't hear about the idea of reincarnation until sixth grade, when the internet was my best friend and I used it too look up "When you feel like you've been somewhere before."

I got plenty of hits for deja vu, but I knew that wasn't it. Finally I found a page with the concept of "reincarnation," and I knew I'd hit the jackpot, threw my nerdy glasses and pre-teen sweatiness I read all about the concept until like, one in the morning on a school night. Oh yeah, I was hardcore.

And I knew that was it. That was what I'd been experiencing ever since our Mrs. Simmons cracked the spine and introduced me to Ancient Egypt. Like it didn't make sense scientifically, cause other articles I read said there'd never been definitive proof of it, but it made sense spiritually, I guess. Ugh that sounds so cheesy, but totally true. I knew I'd been to Egypt before, somehow. Like I could totally picture myself by the Nile River, in ancient clothes, performing some sort of ritual or some shit. I just…._could._

And I guess now I know that reincarnation IS real. But I guess I'll have to tell you about that later. My phone's buzzing. I gotta take this.

Lily? Lily? Are you there? Hey!

_End of recording _


	2. Chapter 2

I don't own anything you recognize, which is totally Hella sad cause I'd bargain to make like five more movies, including ones of my fic cause I'm hella vain. JK. Except maybe not.

_The following is a voice recording from September 5, 2013. _

Dude, I totally feel bad for cutting this thing off last night. It's not like anyone will listen to this.

What?

Yes, Farik, I understand that it's a recording for the Medjai council, blah blah blah. And yes, I'm sure my cute grand babies will drool on it someday or something. Now gimme some privacy, aight? I mean, you already know what happens.

Okay, phew. He's gone. He's like making this a ritual, barging in on my free time and telling me it's time to record of whatever. I mean I know I'm taking a break from college to sort all this shit out, but geez.

Look, you're probably getting the impression that I hate Farik, Ardeth, whoever he was before, but you're totally wrong. He's like an older brother or hot uncle or something. He's annoying as Hell, but also fun as Hell when he's not being a pain in my ass or serving as the new CEO of Anubis Enterprises, which I thought was a company that dealt in oil or something, but was actually….

Okay, you know what? I'm getting ahead of myself. I totes did it last time, and I'm doing it this time, too.

So obviously I gotta take a step back and give past details. I believe last time I was talking about the whole love of ancient Egypt and reincarnation and all that (totally true) jazz.

But anyway, that's what led me wanting to get a summer internship at Anubis Enterprises; this totally amazing and totally new company inside this totally tall building in downtown Chicago. I'd passed it a million times on my way to the L or Metra trains to either get around the city or back home to park ridge. I had a car, sure, but trying to make it get through traffic and finding a parking spot downtown that didn't warrant a hefty fine was definitely not worth it.

See, I found out about the name of the building when I was walking by it on my way to get a donut. My mouth did that stereotypical "drop open" thing when I saw the very familiar face of Anubis looking back at me from a sign that proclaimed that the building, when finished, would become Anubis Enterprises. And this was about two years ago. Since then, the local news stations didn't shut up about the building's progress and talked about it at LEAST every few weeks or so. I remembered telling mom I would have to tour it sometime to see what it was all about.

I didn't find out about actually getting to _work_ inside the building until someone came to one of our classes during the week and spoke for the first ten minutes about the project. It was like any typical class day that morning, except when I walked in some Middle Eastern dude with sunglasses on was standing in the corner, his hands in front of his crotch area, like CIA dudes do. I immediately got a bit nervous, because what the fuck, what if there was some sort of national or even campus security issue going on? I mean, You had three options on where to run off campus, and one landed you right in Lake Michigan, which, in March, isn't exactly _warm_ like the Red Sea is in August.

Jumping ahead again.

Anyway as we took our seats, Dr. Steiner introduced our guest speaker as Mr. Aziz Ayman, which is totally fun to say over and over and over again. According to Steiner, this guy was one of the employees at Anubis Enterprises. In fact, he was one of the higher-ups there. Some CEO assistant or something. I didn't pay attention. I was still too freaked out by his appearance.

He was….scary. I couldn't describe it. It was just something in his demeanor. Not like stereotypical racist terrorism scary. I mean, I'm olive-skinned myself anyway, no way was I gonna assume that crap. It was something else….it was like…evil was rooted in his soul or something.

God that's cheesy.

But it's totally true. The guy just screamed squicky. Now, at the time I was mad at myself for judging someone by his appearance and telling myself that not every idea I had about people was always true. I mean, yeah, this time it technically was since this guy was actually….

Nope. Not gonna spoil it for the grandkids. Gotta keep you on your toes.

Well anyway, just know that I totally should've listened to my instincts and realized he was anything but sunshine and daisies.

So anyway, after Steiner introduced him, Mr. Ayman walked up and whipped his shades off, pocketing them as he started to speak. Now, normally that shit is cheesy as fuck and makes me roll my eyes, but with him it made him even scarier somehow.

"Good afternoon, students." He said it to everyone, but his eyes immediately landed on me.

"Good afternoon," we all said or mumbled, depending on how high we were. I kept my lips closed. His gaze stayed on me for like, five seconds too long, and then he looked away.

"I would like to present to you an opportunity for this summer. I am an employee at Anubis Enterprises, as you know, and we are in need of a summer intern. The position is paid, about $300 a week, and lasts 10-12 weeks, depending on your time frame. The intern will learn about work that Anubis Enterprises does with museums, banks, et cetera. Our security systems are top of the line and are used in many museums around the world, including, of course, the Cairo Museum."

His eyes landed on me again, and despite the creepiness he exuded, I felt myself freeze at the mention of Cairo. Since I'd never been, any connection to Cairo, and heck, any of the four corners of the country, was enough to make me start hyperventilating right there in the room. Which I was basically almost doing at that point, to be honest. ALSO, to be honest, I found it weird that he looked right at me when he said Cairo. Like he almost knew I was in love with it.

But then I remembered that the I had on a shirt with the sphinx wearing sunglasses, and at least some of my superstition went away.

"Now, you probably won't be traveling to Egypt or any of those other countries. Unless you brownnose your way up in rank." He winked and some of the kids laughed. I even cracked a bit of a smile, despite myself. I mean, he might've seemed evil, but even today I would admit that despite his potential evil-ness, he was definitely charismatic. Kinda like Hitler, actually. I mean, no one in the room was secretly checking their phone. No one. And usually they would've by now. Even Professor Steiner was leaning across his little desk-like area, his mouth open in some sorta stupid grin at the joke Mr. Ayman made.

His face got all stern again. "But whether you brownnose or not, this internship is something to be very proud of, and is very prestigious, no matter what work you may be doing. It would look good on any resume, whether you enter the workforce or graduate school. It would be to your advantage to apply. Only one will make it, but I assure you that everyone has an equal chance at receiving the honor."

I almost rolled my eyes. Like, _we get it dude, it's prestigious. You can stop saying it now. _But everyone else's tongues were practically wagging, and when he offered out internship packets everyone took one. Everyone. I shit you not. Usually there's that one kid who grumbles about how she's too busy with work, or some dude has a vacation in Tokyo. But not this time. Even people I _knew_ already had internships potentially lined up took packets. So I just sorta fell in with the crowd and took one too.

The weird thing is though, when he passed them out to everyone he didn't say a word until he got to me. Then, before handing me mine, he said, "I truly hope you apply for this amazing opportunity, Miss Thompson."

I probably gave him the weirdest look because what the actual fuck, this guy wasn't being subtle at all. Back then I thought maybe he thought I was hot or something, which would've been the first time in my life. But now I know his purpose was a lot more evil, which isn't jumping too far ahead. I promise.

Oh, and if you're wondering if I took the application and filled it out, you're damn right I did.

Because the possibility of a connection to Egypt, where I somehow felt at home even though I was like 6,500 miles away, was worth having to work with some creepy CIA man with potential ulterior motives.

At least, that's what I thought at the time.

_End of recording _


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Nothing you see is mine, sadly. Any original characters, meaning all original/reincarnated characters, are, more or less.

Also, if you didn't catch it last chapter, Farik will be revealed to be Ardeth reincarnated. So this IS a Mummy fic, even if so far it doesn't seem clear.

_The following is a voice recording from September 6, 2013._

Yeah, okay, so, the application. Like I said, I totally filled it out. For the Anubis Enterprises internship thing. Did I have a lot of experience? Eh, not as much as I would like, to be honest. I mean yeah, I was basically more or less assistant manager of a CD store in my neighborhood during high school and a bit through college before it went out of business last summer, but that's been it, really. Even though customers were totally shitty overall and I basically spent my time reading fanfiction in a corner (again, because we had no customers), I at least met my best friend, Stephanie Beacham. Okay..why did I say her whole name there? Anyway, Stephanie and I usually dicked around in the back room avoiding our manager, Daryl, who's a lot like Ron Swanson from Parks and Rec except he was just a plain dick and not at all funny or lovable. How we never got fired for our shenanigans is beyond me. I guess cause we were all he had in that crumbling business.

Anyway, I brought up Stephanie for a reason. Because like, the evening after class when I met the weird ass Aziz Ayman (Ha, rhymes with hymen) Steph and I decided to go out for drinks at the Berghoff, which is this cool German restaurant that's basically a thousand years old and is like, right in the middle of downtown Chicago. I mean Hell, they filmed _The Dark Knight_ there. I mean, obviously not all of it. Moving on. We decided to order an appetizer with our fancy shmancy cosmopolitans because what the Hell? Stephanie went to school about an hour away but still lived pretty close to me, but thanks to the nightmare that is college homework it'd been a while since we'd caught up.

So as soon as we sat down, flashed our IDs in this snooty redheaded's woman's face and ordered some nosh as well, I pulled the application out of my bag and showed it to her.

"Dude, that is some expensive looking paper," she said holding it up to the light. "Look! It even has a watermark!"

I scrutinized the paper in the dim bar light and found the silhouette of Anubis smack-dab right in the middle of the paper. How I hadn't noticed something so large and awesome before was beyond me.

The redhead set our drinks down and gave us a strange look as we continued to scrutinize.

"Yeah, those must be some rich Arabic dudes to afford such a cool and fancy watermark," Steph said.

"Yeah, it's almost like they're rich enough to, I don't know, own an entire enterprise."

She sniffed. "Point taken. But seriously, we both know you basically live for Egypt, and-"

"I do not _LIVE_ for Egypt."

"Alex, how many times have you dragged me to the same damn exhibit at the Field? How many hours have we spent in that room so you can look at the same shit over and over, when we could've been at the beach, or at the pier or something?"

"Okay, a million. What's your point?"

"My point is," she said, setting the paper back down in front of me and slapping her hand on it. "Why haven't you filled it out yet?"

"Well, to be honest, cause I'm not sure about working there. Like, the guy who passed out the paper was sorta fucking…weird."

"Weird how?"

I thought about it for a moment. How had he been weird? I mean he was nice, sure, but….he called me out in front of everyone, and suggested, that I, personally, do the internship. And how had he learned my name? I mean it's not like we went around the room and introduced ourselves. So how would he know? Did he do some sort of research about me or something? Or did he ask Dr. Steiner beforehand? Either way, that's creepy. Like, why me? I wasn't some sheik's daughter who could get a job there simply because of whose womb she came out of, and I didn't have anything going before me beyond managing that damned store. Well, I say managing loosely.

Anyway, I told Stephanie everything, even down to his swagger when he'd taken off his eyeglasses, and how it just scared the Hell out of me for some reason. And trust me, saying it out loud to someone else made me feel even sillier. But even though I knew it sounded silly, I knew my feelings were the same. Mr. Ayman was creepy, and someone to be avoided.

"Well, I mean, maybe you won't have to deal with him that much. I mean, I'm sure he's a busy guy. Oh my God, let's look him up on my phone."

She pulled out her smart phone and googled his name, just as our Pierogies hit the table. I took a small bite to test how hot it was and stared at Steph's screen. And there he was. Mr. Ayman himself, smiling into the camera in front of the Great Pyramids. It was weird, but it made me annoyed somehow. Like, someone so creepy shouldn't be allowed in the presence of something so awesome. But since that thought was dumb and possessive over something silly I didn't say it aloud.

"So that's him, I take it," Steph said inquisitively.

I nodded as I took a sip of my Cosmo.

"Yeah, I don't know, I've not ever met him obviously, but he does seem to give some sort of scary air in these pics."

Steph flipped through a few more photos, and they all looked so business-like. Him in front of the pyramids, again, him at a conference, him shaking hands with Donald Trump, him taking a selfie under the Eiffel Tower. Yeah, that's right. A selfie. I thought maybe the link would lead to Instagram, but nope, it just led to a Wikipedia page about him that was pretty boring. It just told when he was born (July 1, 1973), when he moved to the United State (1980) and how he was involved with the company. Not a damn thing to be found under the personal tab. I sat back, disappointed and stuffed another Pierogi into my mouth.

And promptly choked on it when I looked in the mirror, because who should be walking towards the bar and looking right at my reflection, was Mr. Ayman himself. And he wasn't alone.

Behind him walked one of the most handsome men I've ever seen (Hint: it was Farik. And trust me, I still think he's handsome, but in a bigger brother, 'I can appreciate his looks and steer clear of creepy thoughts' kind of way. Spoilers, I know). And not only was he handsome as Hell, but he looked….familiar. Like looking at him in the mirror and making eye contact, the room dissolved around him, and suddenly he was himself but someone else, with long, wavy hair and tattoos on his face. And before that, he was a warrior, his hair up in a pony tail, his face set in a deathly glare.

I blinked and it was over. He was back to being some handsome, spiky-haired trimmed-bearded dude in the Berghoff, walking behind Ayman.

_Oh yeah, Ayman_, I thought. _Fuck._

I took a quick sip of my Cosmo for luck, just as I heard Ayman (We're just calling him Ayman from now on, okay? okay) call out my name.

"Ah, Miss Thompson, it is so good to see you again!"

I swiveled around in my chair and put on my best "You don't creep me the fuck out with your weird obsession with me and your strange demeanor" smile.

"Oh hey, Mr. Ayman, it's good to see you! And so soon!" I almost made a stalker joke, but didn't wanna seem obvious. I just felt like I had to stay guarded somehow. But not too guarded. I touched Stephanie's shoulder.

"This is my friend, Stephanie. Stephanie, this is Mr. Ayman, and this is….um…"

The guy who'd fucked with my vision indirectly didn't say anything for some reason, but kept giving me what I can only describe as a stink eye, or something. I don't know, it was very intense. I mean now I know it's just his usual serious "I'm holding in an emotional fart" face, but then it was all mysterious and weird to me.

Ayman patted him on the back and his mouth curled in a sneer for like, a split second. I know it's a cliche and that's how they always describe it in books, but it's true. It was literally there, and then it was gone. And like most characters in books, I wondered if I imagined it. "This is Farik Naser, he works at Anubis Enterprises as well, as an executive."

"What's that like?" Stephanie asked, her eyes on Farik. I knew that look in her eyes. It was her "He is hot and I want to ride him" look. I looked down and blushed, wishing she wasn't so obvious. I mean, the dude was clearly in his upper thirties or something. He was probably married and had little ones. I subtly looked down to see if I could see a ring on either of his hands (Many Muslims wear their wedding rings on their right hands. See? You get a history lesson AND a story), but both hands were tucked into his pockets.

"It means he basically follows me around all day and does what I say," Ayman said, giving Farik a smile, which Farik promptly ignored. I was beginning to get the feeling that Ayman's obvious good nature towards Farik was probably not returned.

"So," Ayman said, turning back to me and reaching towards the counter, picking up my application before I could get a word out of my mouth. "Haven't filled it out yet. I was hoping with your obvious love of Egypt (he looked down at my shirt that I had worn during class) you would've applied right away. Are you thinking about doing it?"

Geez, I'd barely known this creepy guy twelve hours, and he was still grilling me about the application. And I mean, it wasn't that he asked me about it twice I guess. Any person trying to advertise his company would be a fool not to. It was the fact that he just happened to be here when we were. In a city of millions, it was almost a bit too coincidental. And the way he'd just asked me the question was so loaded, so charged, like something in his life was riding on _my_ answer. I know this shit sounds strange, but trust me, it's exactly how it felt. Like even Stephanie was giving him a weird look.

"Um, well, I mean," I said so poetically.

But then, suddenly, Farik saved me. "It would definitely be an amazing opportunity, Miss Thompson. But of course, we would not hold it against you if you were not able to apply."

_What the fuck, is he discouraging me from doing it or saving my ass_? It was basically the weirdest three minutes of my life thus far (looking back now that was positively fucking tame), and I still didn't know my answer.

"I mean, I'll definitely apply, sure. What college kid couldn't use the money?" Ayman laughed and pointed at me like I'd made some amazing joke, and Farik sniffed and grimaced, like he didn't like my answer.

"That's true, that's true. And between you and me, and Farik and Stephanie, I think you've got a good shot at getting it."

"Why?" I blurted out.

Ayman looked about ready to answer, but before he could Farik reluctantly touched his shoulder as he looked at his watch. "Aziz, it is almost time for our conference call with Seoul. I believe we should leave post haste." _Okay, this Farik dude is like the Arabic Mr. Darcy or something. Handsome and aloof,_ I thought to myself.

Mr. Ayman shook his sleeves up and checked his watch too. "Damn, you're right. Go hail a cab and wait for me. I'll be out in a second."

Farik hesitated for a second, but decided against saying anything and went outside.

Ayman turned back to me and Stephanie. "Apologies on his behalf. He's relatively new to the company and hasn't quite figured out how to interact with other humans."

I let out a fake grin as he reached into his pocket and handed me something. A business card, Raised print. Fancy Papyrus lettering. Obviously very expensive.

"Should you have any questions about the application process," he said, and reached out to shake mine and Steph's hands.

As he left, we gave each other a "What the fuck," sort of look.

"Well, I mean, he's not evil, but he is a bit….intense," Steph said, but I was only half paying attention. Because as I held the business card up to the light, there it was.

Another Anubis Watermark. But somehow (and I didn't even know watermarks could do this) this one had bright, red eyes.

_End of recording_


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: Nothing you see is mine, sadly. Any original characters, meaning all original/reincarnated characters, are, more or less.

_The following is a voice recording from September 7, 2013_

So yeah, I left that shit off at a weird spot. It's almost like I'm trying to write a book of sorts and thought that would be a good cliffhanger. The truth is I had to pee really bad. TMI but there ya go.

Anyway, nothing really exciting happened after that, to be honest. Except for the fact that as they were leaving, Farik turned around and gave me a look that was almost…..pleading. I don't know how else to describe it. Just like, he was trying to tell me something and I couldn't figure out what. And I mean, I'd known the guy like one fucking minute. If he were anyone else, (like Ayman, for example?) he would've creeped me out. But after that weird-ass vision I'd had of him, where he was him, but not him, like a vision (ugh that's so cheesy) I couldn't shake the feeling like he was….I don't know, gonna impact my life somehow. I mean, obviously I was right, since I totally talked about him in previous recordings, but I won't give that away. Sorry. You've been narratively cock-blocked.

Anyway, the next day I was sitting at the kitchen table talking to my mom about the whole thing and eating a bowl of cereal. I mean, usually I tell her EVERYthing, but something about this made me want to not give away every single detail. It was like, I didn't wanna introduce her into the creepy world of Ayman or something. So initially I planned to hold back, but because I'm a fucking blabber mouth (as you can tell) I told her every damn thing. Even about the weird mirage shimmer with Farik.

And of course, her first comment was, "Sweetie, do you think they slipped some sort of drugs into your drinks?"

"What? No! We never looked away from them!"

"Well okay, but that still sounds a bit questionable."

Then of course, she asked the most infuriating question of all, since I came to her for HER advice: "What do you think you should do?"

I rubbed my temple. "I don't know. I mean, I can't shake the creepy feeling, like, he's dangerous or something. And no, it's not racist, I promise. It's just his vibes. But I mean, that's all I've got to go on. It could mean shit and he could be the best guy ever who invites me to lavish parties and accompanies to meetings in Egypt or whatever. I mean, if I got the job of course."

I still had that suspicion I was a shoo-in.

"And I mean, maybe I wouldn't see him at all in the building. It's a big-ass company, and maybe he's just a recruit dude who's too busy pressuring young women into internships. I mean, better than pressuring me for anything else."

I felt nauseous just thinking about that, and I still do, even though, thank god, SPOILERS, that never happened. Just…ew. But I dirgess.

"But then again, Egypt, mom. Like, you know that's what I want more than anything. And if I did this, it sounds like the intern would go on trips overseas and stuff. It's like, too good to be true. So I guess I should fill it out?"

As I swallowed a bite I looked up at my mom. "So….any feedback over there, madre?"

She sighed. "Well, to be honest, I think the opportunity to go to the one place you've wanted to go to since elementary school far outweighs your feelings. I would never want to invalidate those, but you don't have much to go on, and of course, there's always the chance you might not get it anyway."

"That's true," I murmured, making a soup out of my milk and shredded wheat that doesn't have enough frosting on it to be deemed edible (you know what I'm talking about).

And of course, as we all know, I turned in the application. And to make myself look even better to the prospective reviewers, I actually decided to deliver my application straight to the front desk of the Anubis Enterprises building.

After breakfast I went to get changed in my room and I caught myself staring at my Ancient Egypt poster, like I usually did. Well, okay, it _made_ me think of ancient Egypt but it was really just a view of the Nile River. It's basically some sailboats just chilling along the Nile, and you can see some houses dotting both sides of it, but I mean, the sailboats look like they could be from 1800 BC or 1800 AD, so it's sort of timeless.

Anyway, as I stared at the picture I imagined myself there on a yacht of some kind, enjoying hummus or some shit (not literally) and listening to Arabic music as we watched the boat go along the water. To be realistic I added creepy-ass Ayman in there to make it realistic, since, from the way we spoke, it seemed like he would be pretty involved in the process and I would have to see him at least some of the time. But hopefully I could ignore him and maybe hang out with that Farik guy I'd met. Like maybe we'd just finished up some business in Cairo, I took notes during or ran and got Arabic coffee or something while they laid down some deals, then I would lay down my shades on my face as we floated along. The mental image was so fucking awesome.

So I guess, okay, I KNOW that's why I finally decided to truly apply: the possibility of Egypt.

So anyway, I sat down at the kitchen table while mom went to work, and filled it out by hand. I mean I guess I could be fancy and put it through a typewriter or something, or scan it into the computer, but who the fuck cares? As long as I filled it out in nice ink I was hoping I was golden. But as I continued on, I found my self esteem starting to sink. I mean, those kids in my class had actual internships, even if they were the result of nepotism at times more often than not. All I had was a dream, a shitty job at dead CD store, and some weird connection (ew) with Ayman that, for some reason, made him keep asking me to apply in less than 24 hours. Like he'd only asked a few times, but in this case it was more quality than quantity. In fact, that was the only reason I didn't rip the thing up and put it in recycling (save the Earth, people)—the fact that this weird dude had some sort of faith in me, or something (again, ew).

So, to seem even more professional and eager (and to show how desperate I was about Egypt) I put on my finest outfit which was black jeans, a white shirt and black cotton sweater. I put on some sorta flowery scent my mom loved, which she described as "sophisticated but not strong), made my hair look a little less shitty than usual, put on the tiniest tint of lipstick, and headed out with my wallet and application towards the Metra station.

When I arrived downtown, I decided that it would've been a good idea to actually bring some damn cash with me so I didn't have to walk in my heels all the way to the building, which was all the way next to Trump Tower. Seriously, I was so focused on the internship, and Egypt, and all that noise, including the whole weird Farik thing, that I didn't even think of anything practical in the moment. This whole trip was fucking doomed, I'd decided.

Anyway, I ran into an ATM, grabbed a quick taxi, paid the dude, who was talking on his phone in Russian and ignoring me the entire time, and got out. Before I went in, I stared up at the impressiveness of the building itself. It was actually a bit taller than Trump Tower, if you can believe it. I bet Donald was pissed when he found out. I bet he went into Ayman's office, or wait, actually, Mr. Kassis, the guy who actually runs the whole joint, and tried to say "You're fiyuhed." I smiled a bit at the mental image, then realized I probably looked pretty stupid, standing in the middle of foot traffic staring up at a building and smiling stupidly. So I opened one of the huge fancy doors to the first floor. And my jaw dropped. Everything was a tan color. Everything. Okay, not LITERALLY everything. But every surface was the color of sand. I mean with typical office buildings you expect some 'Fifty Shades of Gray' shit with stainless steel all around. But not here. It was really odd and hella cool at the same time.

Then I saw it.

On the wall to my left, between the elevators, was basically a scene out of Egypt. I'm not kidding. The wall was painted with the pyramids in the background, with painted plants in the foreground, along with real, literal plants on some sort of implanted sand dune. In front of it, imprisoned in glass, were tropical fish. I assumed they were ones that could be found in the Nile. It was like something out of a zoo, or an aquarium. I couldn't stop staring at all the fishes darting around, and even noticed the sound of a small fountain trickling somewhere among the plants, I was guessing. It was expensive, it was insane, almost gaudy…and awesome.

In fact, I was so enthralled by the display that I didn't even register the woman getting up from behind a welcoming desk to come towards me.

"Miss?"

I turned my head. And there it was again. That weird-ass feeling that I'd had with that Farik dude. Like, I was light-headed but completely fine. But as the woman came towards me. the air around me shimmered— yes, _shimmered — _and suddenly the woman with straight black hair coming towards me with a smile on her face was the exact same woman, except not. Because her skin was _gold._ Literally painted gold, with black, chainlike designs decorating her body as well. She walked towards me with a smile on her face; a smile I somehow instinctively knew was not genuine. It almost felt like a cat and mouse game. I must've made some sort of funny face because suddenly her lopsided smirk got even bigger as she got closer.

And the one thing that I still remember oh-so vividly all these months later is the hatred I felt for this woman. I didn't know I could feel such disgust. It was as if my very core, the essence of my being, was created with this weird hate that I felt for this woman. It was as if I had been placed on this Earth, wherever I was, to hate this woman. I wanted her dead, and I wanted her dead now.

And then the moment passed, and the scene around me was right back to where we were, and she was just an assistant offering to help me, and I was some ditsy 21-year-old hoping for a job that wasn't at a shitty music store.

I shook my head a bit and forced a smile, despite the fact that I still felt really weird about this chick.

"Can I help you?" she asked, her smile actually genuine, unlike….well, at the time I didn't know who the other woman was, or if I was totally fucking high.

"Uh, yeah, hi, sorry, I'm Alex, I'm here to drop this uh, this internship, application, thing." I shut my mouth, knowing I was making an impressionable start….as a dumbass.

She smiled in sympathy, and I felt the weird hatred I felt earlier spring up just a bit. It was strange. For some reason, even just knowing this chick for like .05 seconds, I didn't trust her. It was like the Ayman thing. Something just felt off.

"I'm Leyla. You are looking or Mr. Ayman, I presume? Or Mr. Naser? They are the ones handling that internship."

I rolled my eyes inwardly. _Great. Somehow I feared Ayman would be more involved than I wanted. _

"Uh, Mr. Farik, actually, would work out great. Thanks."

She nodded and walked back to her desk to assumedly give him a ring to come collect me. I noticed that the swagger she had walking to her desk was the same swagger the woman in the weird shimmery vision thing had. It made me feel weird, so I wandered over to look at the fishies again, hoping to remain professional even as I ogled.

"Mr. Naser is on his way down, ma'am," Leyla called from her desk.

"Okay, thanks." I went back to looking at the fishies, when I heard the clopping of heels from behind me, and say Leyla's reflection in the glass.

"So, you are applying for the 10-12 week internship, yes?"

"Uh, yes," I said politely, feeling a bit weird. I mean, at the risk of sounding sexist, she was a secretary. What interest did she have in what I did? And why did she feel the need to physically some stand by me and interrogate me about it? I subtly shook my head and berated myself. _Calm the fuck down, Alex. She could just be a nice woman making small talk._

But the weird thing was, other people had started to trickle in since I had come in. They were all taking seats on some nice tan couches near the windows, looking at us curiously. I looked back to Leyla, but she paid the people no mind.

"I wish you good luck and hope you will get it," she said. "Rumor has it they're taking maybe five, six trips to Egypt over the courts of those 10-12 weeks. And they'll need an intern at least half the time."

I froze. "Wait, how do you know I wanna go to Egypt so badly?"

She laughed. "It's obvious from the look on your face when you saw the painting on the wall."

I flushed. "Ah."

Just then, the elevator doors opened, and out popped Farik Naser, just as tall, handsome, intimidating and awkward as I remembered him from the day before. He ran his hand through his hair as he exited the elevator, and when he noticed me and Leyla talking he froze slightly before continuing forward. It was weird.

"Leyla," he said, awkwardly, offering her a smile.

She gave him one back, and it reminded me of some sort of animated cat, or the grinch, or something. It was definitely sly. "Farik," she returned, then swagged her way back to her desk, turning around to give me a small wave. He stared after her.

_Maybe they're lovers,_ I thought.

Oh, how far from the truth my assumption was.

_End of recording _


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: Nothing you see is mine, sadly. Any original characters, meaning all original/reincarnated characters, are, more or less.

A/N: So I'm actually going to Egypt in January, which will make this story at least a BIT more accurate once Alex gets to Egypt, which you know she would. Any reviews would be great! This chapter went differently than I envisioned, but I want to speed things up. No more dilly dallying!

_The following is a voice recording from September 8, 2013_

The elevator ride up was awkward as fuck. I mean I had a feeling it would be, what with it being Farik. I mean, even now, we still have awkward as fuck moments. Being who he is, he can just be an awkward guy.

Farik pressed the button for the eleventh floor then stood against the back, arms crossed in front of him, eyes straight ahead. And what made it worse was that the elevator was slow as fuck. And it wasn't one of those cool elevators like the one in the Sears Tower (I will NEVER call it Willis Tower) with a tv for you to watch. Oh no. It had to be an old timey one with awesome wood paneling and nothing to look at but each other or the floor. I decided to be brave and opt for looking at Farik.

"So," I said, drawing it out every-so slightly, to see if he would react. He kept looking ahead. I had to break this stupid tension that I didn't understand. I mean seriously, where the hell was it even coming from? I mean yeah, he could've just been an awkward guy. But I'm one of those people who's paranoid of everyone hating me for some reason or the other. I mean the first few times me and Steph hung out I was still convinced she hated me.

"That Leyla woman is really pretty." I felt dumb, but it was the only thing I could think to say right then.

His gaze turned sharply toward me. "What do you mean?"

"I…mean that she's aesthetically pleasing?" Like, what the Hell? What kinda question was that?

He inclined his head and looked at the floor around his feet. _Okay, for a professional business guy, this guy isn't very professional._ I decided to keep playing the instigator of talking.

"She also said something about the intern possibly making five or six trips to Egypt during their time here."

He nodded, not looking at me. "Yes, that was a possibility, but not likely."

My hope fell. "Oh."

And on that awkward note, the elevator doors opened and we stepped out into the bright natural light pouring into the eleventh floor. No matter how many times I'm able to see the view from skyscrapers in Chicago (which, to be fair, isn't that many times) the view is breathtaking. As much as I hate to admit it to you, a lot of times when I look out over Lake Michigan I pretend it's the Red Sea, thanks to a possibly similar water color. But you didn't hear that from me.

We took a left out of the elevator, then a right, then a left again into a nice, spacious office, with a view of the John Hancock building. If I squinted I could even see people milling about Navy Pier.

Farik adjusted his tie and gestured for me to sit down across from his lavish, steel desk. I noticed there were no personal effects on his L-shaped desk. No photos, no little trinkets, and not even a cup with pens in it. The only thing he had was a steel name plate that Read Farik Naser. A closed laptop sat to his left, and that was it. I took a quick peek at the walls. Nope. Nothing on them at all. Just a boring grayish-white color for wall paint. No wonder this guy acted like he had a stick up his ass; he seemed boring as Hell.

Farik pressed a button under his desk that I couldn't see, and looked over my head. I turned around to see, and realized that the windows had frosted over so no one could see in. It's cliched, I know, but I audibly gulped. I mean yeah, he could've just done it to give us privacy for our interview, but I've read enough of those crappy rich guy/young intern romance novels to know that frosted office windows could have another meaning too. Also, I'd seen plenty of horror movies. Maybe he was a killer.

All I managed to say was, "That's awesome."

Farik crossed his arms. "So, Miss Thompson. Why do you want this position?"

No nice introductions, no explaining anything about the company. Just straight business.

"Well, Mr. Naser, to be frank. I have always wanted to travel to Egypt, and thanks to Aym-Mr. Ayman, I felt this would be a good opportunity."

At the mention of Ayman's name I swear Farik's jaw tensed up a bit, like he was subtly grinding his teeth.

"And is that the only reason, Miss Thompson?" I suddenly felt my chances potentially plummeting. I mean no one gets a job just cause they're _dying_ to go someplace. If that was the case I felt like the internship would've been handed to me the first day when I wore my pyramid shirt. I had to save face.

"Well of course not! As much as I would love to explore Egypt, I see this as a wonderful job opportunity. I worked in a music store for years, and as much as I enjoyed getting work experience and the value of making my own money, I wanted more. I wanted to get beyond that. I'd like to branch out and explore new horizons, both literally and figuratively. I feel that Anubis Enterprises would be just the company to help me add to my resume."

Farik continued to stare at me intently without saying anything for a few seconds after I finished my (awesome) bit, and I looked back, my stomach feeling tight with unease. Not like the unease I felt with Ayman around. Just….nervous. I was hella nervous.

"And what exactly is it that draws you to Egypt, Miss Thompson?

_Huh?_ Like, I mean, I guess it was a normal question, but during a job interview?

Farik leaned forward slightly, his gaze more intense than ever, if that was possible, which I don't think it was.

"Well, I mean, it's one of the longest-lasting cultures on Earth, and the Nile Valley seems beautiful. Plus, it has the only Wonder of the World that's still standing."

He nodded. "Yes, those are all reasons that anyone might give for wanting to go. But I wanted to know what attracted you, personally. Was it perhaps, because you felt as if you'd been there before? Lived there before? During another time? A more ancient time?"

My mouth dropped open. "I don't. I…what?…I…" I was clearly stumped for speech, is what I was. Like, yeah, all of that was true. But why the Hell was this coming up in an interview for an Internship? What did my beliefs on reincarnation have to do with my interview? Were they so Abrahamic they couldn't handle anyone with non-Christian/Muslim/Jewish beliefs? What the Hell kind of company was that? I mean, freedom of religion, man. Plus, how the Hell was it this guy's business?

"I…I personally don't see how this is relevant to my interview."

"It is not."

I gave him a strange look, but before he could press me further, his cell phone rang. He put it to his ear, and not ten seconds later hung up, not a word to the person on the other end of the line. Farik said something under his voice in another language, and if I had a shitload of money right then, I would've bet it all that it was a curse word.

He shoved his phone back into his pocket and turned his attention back to me.

"Alex. There is no time. I thought we would be safe to talk today, but I see that I was mistaken. Ayman is returning, and he must not see you here. Do you understand? If so, he will offer you the job. That has been his plan all along. He needs you Alex. They need your soul."

"Um, what?"

He ignored my question and ran his hand through his hair, before coming around his deck and crouching next to me. I blushed at his proximity.

"Alex. Listen to me. I know Egypt is in your soul. For it is in mine as well. But no matter how much you want this job, no matter how much you wish to travel to Egypt with this position, you cannot do it. It will bring destruction to us all."

"Okay, what the fuck?" That right there would've cost me the internship. But apparently, Farik was some nut job who didn't want me to have it anyway. "What are you TALKING about?"

He put his hand on my shoulder and his eyes bored into me. "Right now you, Alex Thompson, are the most important woman in the world. Do you understand?"

I blinked rapidly. "I mean, I think I'm pretty awesome, but-"

"This is not a time for jokes!" he said sharply, his voice slightly raised, and his eyes immediately filled with regret. "I am sorry. But Alex, you must understand. You are the key. Your past self knows the location Only _you_ know the location. And they will need you to locate the bracelet. If they raise the Creature, he will torture you until he knows where the it is. And should he put it on, he will form an alliance with Matthias and bring forth our demise. I know none of this makes sense," he interjected, noticing my look that clearly screamed _Okay, sweetie, it's time to take those meds you've been skipping,_ "but the bottom line is: you cannot accept this job. You need to go far away. They've probably been watching you. I know they only recently discovered who you are, but who knows what they could've done in the past few days. Ayman would not be here if it they did not have some way of knowing. I suspect Leyla called him as soon as the elevator doors closed."

He went into to his desk and scribbled something on a piece of paper before passing it over to me.

"Meet me at this location tonight, 8 p.m. I understand you have many questions, and I can answer them in due time. But not now."

"Um….no," was all I could muster. If this guy was psychotic, I didn't need to be alone with him.

His eyes were pleading. "Do you not find it odd that the night you were with your friend, Ayman and I just happened to be there?"

I froze. "Well, I mean yeah, but-"

"And is it not odd that Ayman just happens to be on his way back to the office mere minutes after you arrive?"

"I mean, that could just be coincidence."

"It is not," he said matter-of-factly. "And have you not felt uneasy about him since you met him? As if there was something untrustworthy about him? Something that you simply could not shake?"

"Well, I mean, I get that way about quite a few people," I said lamely.

He shook his head. "It is different with Ayman. I felt it too, the moment we met. However, unlike you, I had enough experience to know exactly what it was about him that causes an uneasiness, that makes one uncomfortable."

"So what exactly is it? I asked. I mean the guy was nuts as fuck, but his observations had all been freakishly correct.

"Evil."

_End of Recording_


End file.
